Have no fear NFL picks are here...

So I've been in a coma the last few days and when I woke up the college games had already kicked off. Thank god for Sunday's games though. It will be tough to make up for the disaster of last week but lets give it a shot:

Steelers -3 @ Dolphins: This is a real test for both teams...Big Ben basically came back on a bye last week vs. Cleveland, and Miami won a tough game in OT in Green Bay. The Fish always fucking handle their business in close games and I expect this to be close. To be honest I think the Steelers are going to win by -3 (but I'm too cheap to buy the hook) so I'll take a push.

The Pick: Steelers

Falcons -3.5 vs. Bengals: I know the Bungles are coming off a bye and Dunta Robinson is probably dead so he can't cover the TOcho show but still the Falcons got jumped in Philly last week and they're going to handle their business at home vs. Cincy.

The pick: Falcons

Ravens -700 vs. Bills: I know what you're thinking...you're gonna lay 700 bucks to win 100...of course I am! What kind of a degenerate would I be if I didn't. No fucking way Baltimore loses this game. P.S.- I have the Ravens in a suicide pool also this week...if they lose I'll be on suicide watch.

The pick: Ravens

49ers -3 @ Panthers: Both of these teams suck...and if Carolina was ever gonna win a game, you figure it would be at home off the bye vs. a team like San Fran, but for some reason I think the Niners will pull this game out and hopefully cover for all my faithful fans.

The pick: Niners

There you have it folks...play these 4 games and you'll be laughing all the way to the bank. Sit back, relax and enjoy the motherfucking show.

Bye Week

Just like our beloved Jets, Easy E has his bye week as well. I guess all you degenerates who bet with Easy E every week can thank your lucky stars he is off this week. I am sure he would have went an awesome 8-0 this week, but so be it. Wait till next week.

Just Your Typical Yanks Fan

James? Is that you? Kidding James. I know you would never wear that red jacket.

This is why Yankee fans are so corny though. You have this Elton John wannabe making Yankee videos for Game 6. Maybe the kid is retarded or something, but wow. His parents must be so pissed at him. Just imagine he made himself a Mets fan. He would have never had to endure the embarassment of these stupid ass videos. This dude has 0friends, thats for damn sure. I kinda hope the Yanks win tonight so I can see his game 7 video. Maybe he will drop a little Ke$ha on us.

Money In The Bank

I am going to go out on a limb here and say that AJ Burnet is going to fuckin dominate tonight. A lot of websites that are more popular than ours have "Locks of the Day" or "Mortal Locks" well fuck them. This is a John Anthony Guarantee. AJ Burnet fuckin rapes bitches tonight. If any betting website wants to advertise on our site, just holler baby. We wants to gets paid.

Sportsbook, talk to me. Ive bet with you many times before.
Yanks -156 all night.

Baseball is still gay, and the Titans/Jags game had better ratings than the Yanks game. LOLOL. Shit was a 27 point blowout. I guess we can now really say that baseball is done son.

You're Welcome.
Brian

PS. Spare me all the fake Yankee fans who know shit about baseball saying AJ Burnet sucks. Dude was str8 fire last year. With that fag Posada on the bench, AJ will be DEALING tonight.

Cheap Shot Artist

Brandon Meriweather is the Picasso of a Cheap Shot Artist. Dude must have learned from Rodney Harrison. You might remember Harrison from such incidents as HGH Gate. He was suspended for CHEATING. Weird that cheating got him suspended and not the attempted murder. The NFL is cracking down on illegal hits though. Ask Todd Heap, Josh Cribbs, and Mohamed blah blah blah. I am sure all 3 answers will be the same "I dont remember". They dont remember cause the wood was fuckin layed on them this weekend. I will not say the Dunta Robinson hit was illegal, as I think he led with his shoulder.

I mean, peep the video. Brandon Meriweather seems like an upstanding citizen on the field. If the first video doesnt do it for you, then maybe the second will. Its him stomping on Florida International players back in his college days.





You see Meriweather stomping on some poor players down on the field already? Im sure many wish he was just aborted before birth. Why wont u just die already Brandon? Shouldnt you be in jail or something?

Playing for Pride...

This week is the showdown of all showdowns. 2/3rds of the trio will be meeting up in Fantasy football. Yours truly Easy E and his 0-6 fantasy football team will be taking on 3rd place Brian and his 4-2 team.

I've already spoken to the guys this week and let them know that even though we're out of it, we're playing for pride. Playing for one another. Anything can happen in a rivalry game. We're gonna take it to Brian and his boys this week.

Prediction: Eric's team: 80
Brian's team: 72

Desean you got JACKsonED up...

The Only thing that beats that is this:



"That is a serious knee injury for Willis McGahee"..."Yep".

Cliff BEAST-LEE

I know what you're thinking...wow that's a catchy fucking title to this blog. And you're right...I came up with it last night while I was brushing before bed. Anyway Cliff Lee absolutely fucking dominated the world last night...dude threw like 22 innings and gave up 2 hits. Texas broke the game open in the 9th and are up 2-1 in the ALCS.

The point of this blog however isn't to say how great baseball is. It's to point out exactly why baseball sucks. I was flipping back between the baseball game and the football game last night, and when the first Texas batter got up in the top of the 9th there was about 3 minutes left in the 3rd quarter of the football game. When the last yankee batter got out in the bottom of the 9th the football game had about 45 seconds left. The football game played almost 20 minutes of game time in ONE INNING! Almost 1/3 of the football game was played in ONE FUCKING INNING! Are you kidding me? Baseball is the longest most fucking boring shit on TV right now and I'm not just talking sports...baseball is more boring than a fucking lifetime movie.

Apparently Payback AND Karma are both bitches...

So for the 8 of you that read my payback is a motherfucker blog just a few days ago I've recently learned Karma is a bitch too. I sent bad vibes out to John Elway and what happened? He fucked me in my fantasy game last night. My team was 0-5 heading into the MNF matchup between the Titans and Jags. I was down 21 points, but I had Vince Young. VY goes B-A-N-A-N-A-S on the first drive throwing for 60 yards and a TD like 2 minutes into the game. I've got this shit on lock right? WRONG...karma bites me in the ass as VY goes down for the count and misses the rest of the game. Easy E falls to 0-6 in Fantasy football.

Well that effin hurt

So it seems I never learn my lesson. I really do suck at picking college football...the NFL I'm actually not so bad. Here are week 6 results:

In college:

Utah handled their business and covered vs. Wyoming.

Fucking Florida lost outright at home! vs. Mississippi State! are you effin kidding me?

Alabama won, but didn't cover...the state of Mississippi really fucked me like a 2 bit whore this saturday.

Nevada game I think just went final out in Hawaii and they lost outright too.

As far as the NFL goes:

The Ravens heard that I bet them on the money line and decided to hand the Pats a fucking win. I mean seriously how the hell did the Ravens blow that game? No really, I'm asking anyone who might know because CBS had bull riding on instead of that game so I'm not even sure. Thanks Jim Nantz!

The Falcons fell behind early and get mashed in Philly, at least Dunta Robinson laid the effin wood on Desean jackson to make me feel a little better about losing.

Steelers covered vs. those Cleveland bitches easily.

And semi upset pick of the week Saint Louis won outright at home. If you're dumb enough to bet the Chargers on the road you deserve to lose money.

This week: 3-5

NFL: 9-6

CFB: 3-7

Overall: 12-13

ROI: -$420 (In the red for the first time all season)

229'in It.

Sunday came and Sunday went. Jets played and Jets won. Football has been fuckin awesome this year. My team is 5-1, my fantasy team is 5-1, and (no homo) my boys and I just fuckin rock out every week. This past weekend I had the 229 crew at the crib minus Joe who was in DC.

Ladainian Tomlinson is THAT DUDE. You cant say MVP without thinking LT. This is definately a special football season. I can just feel it. If you readers were smart you would make it even more special by betting against Easy E's pics every week. I am expecting a call from a huge Vegas bookie one day telling us we better not post pics on the blog anymore because its affecting the way people bet in vegas. If you idiots are smart you would be up big money already. I bet against whatever Eric says every week. If he says its sunny, bring an umbrella. Trust me.

But yea, 1st place in the NFL feels fuckin awesome. Being a Jets fan for this long has had me getting use to sucking fat dick. We will suck dick no more. We are the creme of the crop boy. Holler.

PS. Anyone see Braylon getting doing his civil duty and watering the grass in the Denver endzone?? Dude pulled out the sprinkler after raping Chump Bailey.
Peep the 25 second mark. It's watering time.

We Fly High, No Lie

BALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIN



Picture explains it all. Hop off

Hofstra WATTTTTTTTTTTTT

So I just got back from lunch and I had this package waiting for me at my door. Turns out the head coach of the Hofstra Baskeball team sent me a Hofstra hoops shirt along with a little note;

Thanks For The T + The Support! CALL ANYTIME

Mo Cassara




I got to be honest. I have no fucking clue what this guy is talking about. I guess he bought a tshirt from us or something? Welcome to the club buddy. Anyway even though I have no idea why he sent me this I’m totally on board with the Flying Dutchman now. They are my team! In fact I promise you this Mo Cassara. If you make the dance this year the Stool will fly out and party at whatever region you play in and root you the fuck on. That’s a fucking promise from one leader of men to another. Oh and don’t think I’m not going to give you a buzz before that UNC game in the Puerto Rico Tip Off. Shit is on ESPN 2. I need some winners.

PS – After doing some quick research turns out Mo used to be an assistant at BC. Once again this proves what I say about the superfans. The athletes and coaches their actually like us because they agree with everything we say about their student body.

Double PS – I told the Sales Guy what happened and his first question was “Do a lot of Jews go there?” Fucking sales guy.

So I just peep my second favorite website, barstoolsports.com. While perusing the Boston part of it, I came across the above article. Hofstra made it son. STAND UP. Hofsta Basketball 2010-2011 ALL FUCKIN DAY.

We got El Pres and the rest of the stoolies on board now. Lets get some.

ALCS Preview

As anyone didnt see this happening. The only surprise here is that I was actually wrong. I didnt know the Twins were actually the Royals just dressed in Twins uniforms for the ALDS. That shit was pathetic right? Well, for the ALCS its no different. The Yankees will win in 5 games. As they fall behind tonight 1-0, they will sweep the rest of the series. Baseball is for the birds. I dont give a shit who wins, but it will be Yanks in 5. All the fake yankee fans who have no idea the pitching rotation will be happy. "Yo.. Bro, whose pitching tonight bro? Umm, CC Sabathia. Heard of him?

Taking It Back

Last Sunday, I went to my fav. place to watch football games on television. North Brunswick Pub and Grill on Route 1. Let me say that I would NEVER watch a Jets game there. I only watch those games live in person, or at a friends house that passes the Jets test. Real fans know what that means. Onto to the point of the blog though.

A few months ago, I wrote a blog about one Jamie J (Jeans pictured above). In that blog, I mentioned that she was a curse to all of my sports teams yadda, yadda, yadda. At that time, we were not really talking all that much, so it was easy for me to blame something on her such as this. Truth is, we dated for a few weeks way back when and all my teams slumped when I was with her. I told her it was her fault, but looking back, it really wasnt. My teams just fucking sucked dick.

Hofstra Basketball had its best years when we were together. So I cant really blame her for that one.

New York Yankees, nough said. I apologize to all men across the country for liking baseball. WTF was with me back then? Baseball is a sport for women. I should be kissing Jamie's feet for gettin me out of baseball. (She didnt really get me out of baseball, but I saw what a herb I was back then)

New York Jets. Wow I love the Jets. They had some years with a few wins here and there but for the most part they never pieced it together. Last year, they hired Rex Ryan as hashem errr I mean coach. Since then, they have made it to the AFC Championship every single year. Is that good? NBD. **I took Jamie to her first Jets game ever. They lost. Victor Hobson returned a fumble to the 1 fuckin yard line and they couldnt score. Thats where some of that hate comes from in regards to my fave. teams**

Recently, Jamie has lifted her hate ban on me and we have talked a few times. At first, I was very hesitant moving foward with this, but she insisted. Now, the Jets are in first fuckin place, and just ballin' all year long.

I write this blog because at The Pub last week, Jamie mentioned the past blog. So I guess i owed her an apology. Here ya go Jamie. Baby steps

Payback is a bitch motherfucker...

Hall of Fame quarterback John Elway and a business partner invested $15 million with a hedge-fund manager who was recently arrested for running a Ponzi scheme.

The Denver Post reported that the two invested $15 million with Sean Mueller in March with the understanding that the money would be placed in a trust until a final decision was made about where it would be invested.

About 65 people had invested $71 million with Mueller over the past decade. Yet in April, Mueller only had $9.5 million, according to a state investigator. He turned himself in to authorities on Wednesday on charges of racketeering, securities fraud and theft, and is being held in prison on $2 million bond.

Elway and his partner have asked that their claim be processed ahead of any other investors' because their $15 million was supposed to be placed in a trust, not pooled with the money of the rest of the hedge fund. According to an April filing, $12 million of Elway's money was placed into a Morgan Stanley trust account, as expected. The other $3 million has gone missing.


Well, well, well...what do we have here? To our readers out there, let this be a lesson...karma always fucking gets you. Even if it's 12 years later and goes by the name of Sean Mueller the hedge-fund manager. You think you could get away with beating our beloved Jets in the AFC Championship game and nothing would happen? Wrong bitch...and now you pay to the tune of 3 million dollars and public embarrassment for being stupid enough to invest with a hedge-fund manager. Were you living under a rock for that whole Bernie Madoff incident? Oh and by the way John, that was our year, congrats on getting lucky with 6 Jets turnovers. I hope you've learned your lesson.

P.S.- Big ups to my boy Sean Mueller for rockin a cool 3 millie from this little Elway bitch. Guaranteed you look in this Mueller guys closet you'll find an old #28 Curtis Martin jersey.

P.P.S.- Wipe that smile off your face you fucking bitch.

Easy E's Picks Week 6

So it was a struggle last week...1-3 just isn't gonna cut it for the six of you that read our blog. This week I'm firing bullets early and often and I'm going to try and get back on track. I'm 0 for my last 4 picking college after a 2-0 start, so logic says that I should slow down there...but in the name of being a true degenerate, not only will I pick college games this week, but I'm picking the most games so far this season...here we go:

Utah -20.5 @ Wyoming: I know you're thinking, why does this kid pick these redic conference games...blah blah blah...bottom line is Utah is a scoring machine, and Wyoming has literally nothing in the entire state except like six chicks with herpes.

The pick: Utah

Florida -$300 money line vs. Mississippi St: Miss St. is actually not that bad, but Florida is coming off of 2 losses in a row and playing at the swamp, there is no way Urban Myer lets his guys blow a 3rd game in a row especially at home.

The pick: Florida

Alabama -20.5 vs. Mississippi: Yes, as you can see I hate the state of Mississippi. I'm picking against both of their teams, but to be honest I don't get upset because most people in that state can't even add to two to be able to figure that out. Bama is gonna roll effin tide.

The pick: A-LA-BAMA (done in Keith Jackson voice)

Nevada -7 @ Hawaii: The O/U in this game is no joke like 420 points or something...and I'm pretty sure when Hawaii is home the games are played on like Tuesday or something...but I'm sticking with my wolfpack...even though they fucked me once before, they should beat the warriors waaaay out west.

The pick: Nevada

Onto the NFL:

Ravens +120 @ Pats: I was considering taking Baltimore plus the points, but then I realized fuck that...I can win extra money by taking them on the money line. Baltimore is one of the 3 best teams in the league, and New England is not...I realize the Pats are coming off a bye and want pay back and all shit like that, but it's put up or cut your pussy ass hair time for Mrs. Brady. This game shows what both teams are made of.

The pick: Ravens

Falcons +125 @ Eagles: This is basically the same game as the Ravens/Pats just in the NFC. You can argue that the Falcons are the best team in the NFC, so it's hard to not like them to win especially with K. Kolb getting the nod in philly this week.

The pick: Falcons +125

Steelers -13.5 vs. Browns: Wow...what can you say. You HATE laying 2 td's in ANY division game. And the Browns defense actually isn't THAT bad. But...Big Ben is back from raping chicks for 4 games, and the Steelers are coming off a bye. Did I mention they are playing IN pittsburgh AND Colt McCoy is getting the start? Hell...I'd lay 3 td's here.

The pick: Steelers

Rams +8.5 vs. Chargers: Well well well...so far this season we've learned a few things...neither of these teams can play on the road. San Diego has to be one of the biggest road money burner teams in recent memory. St. Louis sucks, don't get me wrong, but picking up more than a TD at home vs. a team that hasn't won on the road since the Clinton administration...I'll take my chances.

The pick: Rams

There you have it folks...8 games this week instead of 4...so be prepared to lose twice the amount of your money! Either way just sit back relax and enjoy the games.

Do I Curse Too Much?

So after this weeks Monday night beatdown of the Vikings, the question was raised if I curse too much at Jet games??

Am I a degenerate? I dont think so. I mean, I give to all types of charities and shit. So what I curse at Jets games right? We have this family that sits 2 rows in front of us. They bring their kid to games sometimes. He has to be no older than 2. Can he actually hear me? Hell no. This kid cant even wipe his own ass yet. He still shits himself. Do you think if I call Brett Favre a "fuckin bitch ass" he is going to remember it? I highly doubt it. If he does, then I think I would be the worlds best teacher. Molding young minds 2 rows in front of me at the age of 2.

Onto older subjects. If you go to a football game, and you are offended by cursing then suck my dick. My good friend Beef said I curse too much, but she later said that it didnt offend her, and she didnt care. I agree with Beef. I do curse a lot at games, but I kind of dont care. I pay $120 a game to have the time of my life, and when the Jets win, I do. I had a fuckin blast Monday Night. We had steak, chili, and buffalo chicken at the tailgate. We had a D-Lo pick 6 to ice the game, and we had a L. Coles' Stepfather fantasy win. What is better than that? NOTHING. Also, the time we had Monday night was epic. The tailgating crew was into it as ever, and the rain made it that much cooler. We were soaked, but fuckin warriors through and through. We are like the fuckin USPS, no rain, sleet, or snow is stopping our crew.

-Brian

One area of improvement...

Jeez...I felt like I was back in the Herman Edwards/Dick Curl era on Monday night at the end of the game with the clock management bullshit that Sanchez and Co. tired to pull. Clock management is something that I will never understand in the NFL. I realize that 99% of the players and coaches are border line retarded, I mean these dudes are getting like 8's on their wonderlics...that's equivalent to like a 650 on the SAT or something. But even with these idiots running the show, how hard is it to figure some of this shit out....here is the situation I'm talking about:

1st and 10 from our own 35 with 2:47 left on the clock. Vikes have 0 timeouts left. If we can call a run play that lasts 7 seconds, the play clock will reset with 2:40 left and we do NOT have to snap the ball again before the 2 minute warning.

Now you'd have 2nd down at 2:00....you run the ball 2x's taking off 45 seconds each time.

Now (assuming you don't make a first down) it's 4th down with 30 seconds left.

After the punt, the Vikes have 20 seconds and NO TIMEOUTS left on the clock.


In that situation, IMHO running a play that kills 7 seconds on first down is MORE important than gaining yardage. Even if we had to lose 10 yards to kill the time, it's worth it.

What play does Shotty call on 1st down? A run to LT RIGHT UP THE MIDDLE! The play clock reset at 2:42 so we HAD to run a 2nd down play prior to the 2 minute warning. If you call a pitch/sweep to the outside you can stretch that play for the 7 seconds you need and end the game for all intents and purposes.

So yes, while Sanchez blew the 2nd down, I'm 99% sure that the 1st down strategy of burning 7 seconds off the clock NEVER EVEN CROSSED the coaching staffs minds. That is what scares/annoys me.


Now I can already hear what everyone is saying "But Easy E, we won the game, can't you ever be happy?" Sure I'm happy as fuck that we won, but that "we won so we don't have to fix mistakes attitudes" is what has the Jets on a 41 year losing streak.

Coach Ryan, on the 72 trillion to 1 chance that you read this, please hit up efyousports@gmail.com and I'd be happy to take over late game time management duties.

Easy E weekend picks recap...

I got smoked harder than a joint at Ricky Williams house this past weekend. Like I told you all, college football is my nemesis. 0-2 on Saturday and a split on sunday.

Here is the quick recap:

Ohio State JUMPED Indiana, and put up some big numbers early, but they took their foot off the gas and their defense played lights out...fell a bit short of the under.

South Carolina beat the effin shit outta Bama early and often...they scored a lot more than I thought and the game broke the over pretty easily.

On Sunday I was totally off with the Texans...G-men DESTROYED them...jumped out to a 21-0 lead and never looked back.

The only game I called last week was the Titans over the Boys in Dallas. Titans were getting 6.5 and they won outright...too bad I didn't have em' on the cash line.

Results for the Year:

Last week: 1-3

NFL: 7-4

CFB: 2-4

Overall: 9-8

ROI: +$10

This weeks picks coming soon.

Hop off our Dicks son...

Huge win last night in the pouring rain. The trio toughed it out and didn't run for cover like the rest of the "fans" at the game. All of the sudden same old jets is out of our vocab faster than Brett Favre can get his dick on a cell phone camera. Of course we have to deal with the fake fan people now...as you can see the NY Jets are straight trending right now son...2nd most searched for term on Yahoo. Is that good? Don't hate baby...J-E-T-S all day every day.

We Ballin Boyyyy!

I don't care how bad they got their asses whopped last weekend. This is by far, the most swagtastic, entertaining, and exciting team to ever play Division I football. THE U baby!



-Jumpoff

Go Cocks

Tomorrow at College Gameday, EFYOUSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM will be live and in person. By live, I mean we will have a sign there. Our boy Mikey Fellz and his bro, Dougie Fresh will be live in the flesh at Gameday. Look for the sign, it will be in the crowd. Just wanted to send a special thanks to Mike for reppin the good ol' blog.

Go Gamecocks.

Half and Half

Just saw that Darrelle Revis is medically cleared by the Jets team doctors to play Monday Night against Lito Sheppard and the Vikings. In this blog I am going to give you my 2 cents. Split in half though.

If Doesnt Play: Revis if you dont play, you are fuckng pansy ass bitch. You fuckin hold out on us for all of training camp, only to come back and get shit on by Randy Moss in Week 2. How about a little conditioning you bitch? Stay in shape while holding out and asking for all of this dinero son. Jets paid you, and you knew it was coming, but yet you couldnt stay in shape? What gives hombre?

If Plays: A Vagiant fan wrote the above paragraph. You are the man. I am so happy you held out in training camp. You rested your body, and you are good to go for longer this year, as we will need you in the playoffs even more this year. I aint mad at ya for missing 2.5 games already as it gave Cromo and KDub a chance to shine. Cant wait to see you out there Monday night babe. I love you.

Also, If you think this is funny in any way, Revis, I made you laugh last year in Tampa when i said Antonio Bryant sucks, and you should give me your gloves. If you wanna holler at me, hit us up on the email. We can chill at the mall or whatever. I can teach you how to dougie, maybe even a little madden action (im filthy in that game). The box is flooded, but I will find yours.

Now I've seen it all...

Don't get me wrong, I've seen some rare shit in my life. Like the picture of these animals for example. I just posted this blog like 8 seconds ago and they're probably all extinct already. Just when I thought I saw it all I tuned into ESPN tonight. Nebraska vs. K-State...Nebraska is rollin those pansy ass bitches when boom K-State makes a QB change and out comes #7 Klein. Now I'm a Klein so I know that my Jewishness limits my athletic ability. I used to be the top scorer in the JCC league, but as soon as I hit public school I was just another face in the crowd. Anyway K-State has this motherfucker running the option! Can you imagine? A Jew running the option! Now that truly is some rare shit.

Are you effin kidding me?

Thanks to ESPN for the article

A devout Michigan State football fan called timeout before doctors could install a pacemaker in his chest Thursday, deferring the procedure until after the school's football game this weekend against rival Michigan.

Major Hester said he's willing to risk death so that he can watch Saturday's game in Ann Arbor on television. The Spartans are ranked 17th in the country and the Wolverines are ranked 18th.

The 69-year-old retired office supply clerk said he put off the procedure until next week because he can't risk something going wrong on the operating table that would prevent him from watching the game.

"You never know," Hester told The Detroit News as he paced back and forth in his living room. "It's like going into combat. You may come home alive or you may come home dead."

Hester suffers from cardiomyopathy, a condition where the heart muscle is weakened. He said he's aware of the risk he's taking but is willing to take the chance.

"Whatever happens, I want to see the game," he said.

His friends took Hester's decision in stride.

They say Hester gives himself pep talks to try to "keep it calm" during games, turns down the television volume to keep from getting too excited, and smacks the coffee table, screams at coaches and curses out the referees from his couch. He's even been banished to his bedroom like a scolded child and forced to watch games alone.

"I want to run the ball with them," said Hester. "I want to catch the pass."



At first I was thinking no big deal, just another Michigan State heart attack article. Then I got to reading about our boy over here. First of all you know this dude is the real deal with a name like Major. I'm thinking holy shit this guy and I have so much shit in common it's crazy...we both give ourselves pep talks during games and curse mother fuckers out and shit like that. Obviously I'm a littler cooler than he is, because he's got fucking cardiomyopathy which sounds like some sorta fucked up shit. I'm all ready to give this guy his props for risking his life and shit to watch his team, but then I re-read the article. First sentence, second paragraph. "Willing to risk death so he can watch the game on TV?" Are you effin kidding me? What a fucking pussy ass bitch. Does this dude not know that the trio just fucking braved getting a cold in like 48 degree weather in Buffalo in only 2 sweatshirts and 2 pairs of socks? I had to take like six airborne that my mom packed for me before the game just to keep from catching a cold. This fucking guy is full of excuses...and shit, c'mon dude if you're a Michigan State fan you're in East Lansing...the trip to Ann Arbor is probably like 12 minutes. Here's to hoping you don't die this weekend Major, but don't think you're hot shit or anything either.

Doc-Tober

So I have been on Roy Halladays dick for madd long. I always say he is the best pitcher EVER. I get rejected most of the time. I hear Pedro, Nolan, etc. I still stand by this statement though. This man is a work-a-holic. He gets his first ever Post Season start last night and goes BEASTMODE on the Reds. Dude threw a 104 pitch no hitter. It's insane what this man can do. He has like 1500 complete games, and now he has 2 no-hitters in 1 season. One was a perfect game. Imagine if this dude was in the NL all his career? He might have had multiple 30 win seasons.

This is just a blog to thank Mr. Halladay for switching leagues. Actually, fuck that. I hate baseball, and dont give a shit where he pitches, and who wins. I am just happy he is doing his thang. Me and Fellz know whats up with this dude.

PS. If CC did this last night, there wouldnt be a blog about it. Roy Halladay is mah dude.

Easy E's Picks Week 5

So overall I'm still up for the season...here are this weeks picks:

I went 0-2 in college last week ATS, so I'm gonna switch it up and play a little O/U game.

Alabama @ South Carolina: Big ups to Mikey Fellz a close friend of the trio who will be making the trip to Columbia, SC this week to catch the cocks. Dude is probably also gonna try and make the game. That place is gonna be goin effin NUTS....USC east always plays well at home and always has a good crowd, but Bama' is the class of college football and it aint even close. With Bama coming off a very emotional win at home over Florida, I expect them to be a little down in this spot. That's not to say they won't win, but I expect a close low scoring game.

The Pick: UNDER 48

Indiana @ THE Ohio State University: THE osu gave their fans a scare last week in Champagene, but they pulled it out anyway. Terrell Pryor might be banged up, but you know anyone with a haircut like that is gonna man the ef up and play. The spread is 21 and change, and I think we're going to see a high scoring game. I'm looking for the Bucks to bounce back big back at home. Something along the lines of THE osu 45 and Indiana 20.

The Pick: OVER 57.5

Moving along to Sunday:

New York VaGiants @ Texans: Texans went out west last week and handled their business, G-men DOMINATED on defense at home, had like 271 sacks, knocked out Jay Cutler, and still were only up 7 points with 6 minutes left in the game. Houston is the real deal and I think the cream of the AFC is better than the not so much cream of the NFC. Expect All day Andre to be back playing this week, and a big win for Houston.

The Pick: Texans -3

Titans @ Cowboys: Both of these teams are sorta unknowns, the Boys' started 0-2 before getting a nice win vs. Houston but then they had a bye. The Titans handled their business in NY vs. the G-men but then lost at home to Denver. I think Chris Johnson is set for a monster day, and while I expect it to be a close game (maybe even with Dallas winning) I don't expect Dallas to cover.

The Pick: Titans +6.5

Enjoy the games bitches.

Boyce Avenue

So a few years ago, I came across the ill youtube group. Today, they are still pumping out hits.

Normally, I dont like to take this blog into the realm of music, but I figured I owe it to Alejandro Manzana to post him up on one of the top 15 blogs in the country. They are a sick cover band, but have recently dropped an album of their own joints. I recommend you check them out on youtube. Tell em efyousports sent ya.

Here is a sample:

Super Bowl Path

I am into booking road trips in advance. So I am asking our readers my best path to get to the Super Bowl. Should I drive? Its in Dallas which is a hella trek. Flights will be rather expensive, and far less fun. There is no trains there, or none that I would take. I guess my only means to get there is driving. Its only 25 hours. No big deal right? We have done NoLa, and Nashville. Plus 25 hours of Super Bowl week aint shit. I only pose this question to ya'll now because we are gettin Santonio Holmes, Calvin Pace, and Revis back this week. Heard of em?

Dallas is going to be sick. Might as well book it now, cause shits on lock. Jets baby.

For Real??

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Playoffs

I would normally leave a baseball blog to one of our baseball experts here at efyousports, but no one likes baseball.

Tomorrow night, the Yankees kick off their title defense in what is sure to be a snoozefest of a baseball playoff series. The Twins blow, and the Yankees should steamroll them. Look for ARod to be the playoff hero like he was last year, and the Yanks to win in 4. Without Morneau, the Twins stand no chance of winning. They dont have Kent Hrbek, and Kirby Puckett anymore. They start Carl Pavano, and some other scrubs. CC, Yankee Doodle Andy, and Phil Hughes should take 3 fuckin shits on them, and win in 4. Only loss will come in the Pettitte start when the bullpen blows it.

I will see you bitches for my ALCS blog.

Go Yanks, I guess.

Ridin' Dirty

Another week, another DWI. This time its Dwayne Jarrett. I hope everyone is up in arms over this. I mean, Braylon Edwards almost had his dick cut off by all the media 2 weeks ago. Braylon missed a quarter of football, returned, scored, dougied, and won. This time around, I would expect Jarrett to be suspended since its his second arrest for DWI. He will be cut as well. Even so though, I bet no one talks about this because he isnt on the New York Jets. Everyone hates the Jets, so you have to HATE them.

Just another blog about the best team in football, and how everyone hates them. Eat a dick Dwayne Jarrett. Enjoy food stamps.

-Brian

I'm moving to Canada

So as the six of you readers know, 2/3 of the trio was across the border this weekend in Canada and let me fucking tell you...that place is the shit!

We were hungry so we went to some souvenir shop for a hotdog and next thing we knew dude in there was tellin us about proplays or prosport or some shit. Whatever the fuck it's called it should be called "Canada shits on America".

Here is the idea...you can go into any corner store in Canada and BET ON FOOTBALL. That's right..you effin heard me right...just like you play lotto here in the what used to be the good ole' US and A, our norther neighbors allow you to bet the NFL.

So let's do a comparison here:

Canada: Drinking age is 19, some of the best strip clubs in the world, Betting on football at your local CVS, Casinos on every other fucking block, hot french canadian sluts

USA: Homeless people with AIDS.

Canada wins...see you bitches up north.

Easy E's weekend picks recap

So I know that most of you were shittin your pants after I went 0-2 Saturday, but c'mon you didn't think Easy E would keep you hangin....a bang out 2-0 on Sunday puts me even (less the vig) for the weekend.

Wisconsin vs. Michigan State: I dunno what the fuck happened here, apparently teams are motivated by coaches after heart attacks....MSU plays Michigan this week, so we will find out which one of those teams is for real and which is isn't.

Nevada vs. UNLV: You'll have to excuse Nevada...they are new at not sucking...dudes rushed for like 400 yards and had the ball in goal to go territory late in the game with a chance to run up the score AND cover, and the bitches took a fucking knee. Easy E doesn't forget shit like that.....when you're fucking Nevada you need all the help you can get in the polls.........run up the score you pussies.

Texans vs. Raiders: Fuck the Raiders, they suck...Texans covered without Andre Johnson playing.

Chargers vs. Cards: This game was a fucking joke...Kerry Rhodes scored a TD for Arizona, I'm surprised dude had enough time to tweet while running towards the endzone and still score. What was the final here like 112-8? Effin blowout city like I was hoping for.

Total Season Results:

NFL: 6-3 +$240

CFB: 2-2 -$20

Overall: 8-5 +$220

NFL vs. CFL

As we departed for Buffalo, we thought we would see 1 CFL game on Saturday, and an NFL game Sunday. Little did we know that the Buffalo Bills were actually a real CFL team, just disguised in NFL jerseys.

On a serious note.. Did that game really happen? Is Ryan Fitzpatrick really an NFL quaterback? AHAHAHA. That shit was fun as hell. Our crew invaded Ralph Wilson and had the time of our lives. We not only saw our first in person weeble wobble, but we saw an epic beatdown.

We pulled up in the Town and Country, and had the best taigate. We were CRUSHING Orange Juice like it was going out of style. Had pancakes that tasted like heaven, and even made ourself some fuckin McDougie's (Sausage wrapped in Pancakes. Named after Braylon Edwards weekly TD Dance. I made my grilled chicken special, and we jus balled out. Once we arrived in the stadium, it was fuckin GO TIME.

I would go into details of the game, but it wasnt much of a game, and it was over before it started. I have a few questions though. How did the Dolphins only score 15 points on this team? Bitches.
How did this team score 23 points vs. the Pats? Bitches.

News and Notes.
Note to self. Never go back to Buffalo. I have never seen so many poor people grouped into 1 stadium in my life. Ehh, I guess Miami had a lot of trash in their place last year, but who cares. Just dont do there.

Girls are so ugly in Buffalo. I mean wtf. Have you ever heard of makeup, or a fuckin mirror? Was this a joke? Was it ugly weekend in Buffalo? I felt like I was Brad Pitt, and these hoes were trailor trash.

Canadian people are nice. I enjoyed their company.

3-1 heading into Monday Night Football. Getting back Calvin Pace, Santonio Holmes, and Darrelle Revis. LOOKOUT.

-Brian