Back by popular fucking demand...

I thought my career as a blogger might have come to an end and then my boy Steve-O jumps in talkin about how he's all depressed and shit that he hasn't seen Easy E's picks in a few weeks. You know I can't like Steve-O down so these are for you my man:

Texans +1.5 @ Jacksonville: So really both of these teams suck...the Jags we all knew would suck, and the Texans are on their way to yet another average 8-8 or 9-7 season. The Jags actually play alright at home in front of the 7 or 8 hundred that show up each game, but Houston was embarrassed last time they stepped on the field. The Texans literally have no defense at all, but they can score...I'm going with the better of the two shitty teams getting a point and a half.

The pick: Texans +1.5

Titans -2 @ Dolphins: This game SCREAMS Titans...Randy Moss' first game in Tennessee, CJ2k goin fucking buck wild and CHAD FREAKIN PENNINGTON starting for Miami...that's right CHAD PENNINGTON. The Dolphins have yet to win a game at home (0-3) and the Titans should be set to fucking roll them. One thing I've learned in years of watching the NFL...when there is a sure thing you bet against it.

The pick: Dolphins +2


Jets -3 @ Browns: Fuck the Browns...honestly they do play solid defense I'll give them that, but fucking Colt McCoy? I don't think so mother fuckers and part of the trio is making the trip out to C-town to watch the beat down. Jets get right this week.

The pick: Jets -3


AND FOR THE KISS OF DEATH:

Eagles -3 @ Skins: So my boy Steve-O is a huge Birds fan (nobody's perfect) and he says that I always hate on the E-A-G-L-E-S Eagles in my picks. Vick is doin his thang right now in the city of brotherly love and it's a rematch vs. their old QB Donovan (unless he gets benched again). One thing I'll give Philly is that they are hands down the most explosive team in the NFL. Hate to go against teams coming off the bye but I'ma do it for the 2nd time this week.

The pick: Birds -3

Now sit back, relax and enjoy the games.

"You can't be me, I'm a Rockstar!"

Before Desean Jackson, Young Money Brandon Jennings, and John "Teach me how to Dougie" Wall, there was a six footer out of Georgetown who burst onto the NBA scene in 96 who transcended the game of basketball forever! Well over a decade later, and basically fucking banished from the NBA, the Answer Allen Iverson is still treated like a fucking king no matter where he's at. The true pioneer of #SWAG!

Recently, Iverson signed a two-year, four million dollar deal with the Turkish squad Beşiktaş. You know me, I'm the biggest hater of international athletes/leagues and find them to be inferior to it's U.S. counterparts. The great Kenny fucking Powers said it best, "I've been called a xenophobe, but the truth is, I'm not. I honestly just feel that America is the best country and the other countries aren't as good." Preach Kenny, fucking preach!

-Jumpoff

Have no fear NFL picks are here...

So I've been in a coma the last few days and when I woke up the college games had already kicked off. Thank god for Sunday's games though. It will be tough to make up for the disaster of last week but lets give it a shot:

Steelers -3 @ Dolphins: This is a real test for both teams...Big Ben basically came back on a bye last week vs. Cleveland, and Miami won a tough game in OT in Green Bay. The Fish always fucking handle their business in close games and I expect this to be close. To be honest I think the Steelers are going to win by -3 (but I'm too cheap to buy the hook) so I'll take a push.

The Pick: Steelers

Falcons -3.5 vs. Bengals: I know the Bungles are coming off a bye and Dunta Robinson is probably dead so he can't cover the TOcho show but still the Falcons got jumped in Philly last week and they're going to handle their business at home vs. Cincy.

The pick: Falcons

Ravens -700 vs. Bills: I know what you're thinking...you're gonna lay 700 bucks to win 100...of course I am! What kind of a degenerate would I be if I didn't. No fucking way Baltimore loses this game. P.S.- I have the Ravens in a suicide pool also this week...if they lose I'll be on suicide watch.

The pick: Ravens

49ers -3 @ Panthers: Both of these teams suck...and if Carolina was ever gonna win a game, you figure it would be at home off the bye vs. a team like San Fran, but for some reason I think the Niners will pull this game out and hopefully cover for all my faithful fans.

The pick: Niners

There you have it folks...play these 4 games and you'll be laughing all the way to the bank. Sit back, relax and enjoy the motherfucking show.

Bye Week

Just like our beloved Jets, Easy E has his bye week as well. I guess all you degenerates who bet with Easy E every week can thank your lucky stars he is off this week. I am sure he would have went an awesome 8-0 this week, but so be it. Wait till next week.

Just Your Typical Yanks Fan

James? Is that you? Kidding James. I know you would never wear that red jacket.

This is why Yankee fans are so corny though. You have this Elton John wannabe making Yankee videos for Game 6. Maybe the kid is retarded or something, but wow. His parents must be so pissed at him. Just imagine he made himself a Mets fan. He would have never had to endure the embarassment of these stupid ass videos. This dude has 0friends, thats for damn sure. I kinda hope the Yanks win tonight so I can see his game 7 video. Maybe he will drop a little Ke$ha on us.

Money In The Bank

I am going to go out on a limb here and say that AJ Burnet is going to fuckin dominate tonight. A lot of websites that are more popular than ours have "Locks of the Day" or "Mortal Locks" well fuck them. This is a John Anthony Guarantee. AJ Burnet fuckin rapes bitches tonight. If any betting website wants to advertise on our site, just holler baby. We wants to gets paid.

Sportsbook, talk to me. Ive bet with you many times before.
Yanks -156 all night.

Baseball is still gay, and the Titans/Jags game had better ratings than the Yanks game. LOLOL. Shit was a 27 point blowout. I guess we can now really say that baseball is done son.

You're Welcome.
Brian

PS. Spare me all the fake Yankee fans who know shit about baseball saying AJ Burnet sucks. Dude was str8 fire last year. With that fag Posada on the bench, AJ will be DEALING tonight.

Cheap Shot Artist

Brandon Meriweather is the Picasso of a Cheap Shot Artist. Dude must have learned from Rodney Harrison. You might remember Harrison from such incidents as HGH Gate. He was suspended for CHEATING. Weird that cheating got him suspended and not the attempted murder. The NFL is cracking down on illegal hits though. Ask Todd Heap, Josh Cribbs, and Mohamed blah blah blah. I am sure all 3 answers will be the same "I dont remember". They dont remember cause the wood was fuckin layed on them this weekend. I will not say the Dunta Robinson hit was illegal, as I think he led with his shoulder.

I mean, peep the video. Brandon Meriweather seems like an upstanding citizen on the field. If the first video doesnt do it for you, then maybe the second will. Its him stomping on Florida International players back in his college days.





You see Meriweather stomping on some poor players down on the field already? Im sure many wish he was just aborted before birth. Why wont u just die already Brandon? Shouldnt you be in jail or something?

Playing for Pride...

This week is the showdown of all showdowns. 2/3rds of the trio will be meeting up in Fantasy football. Yours truly Easy E and his 0-6 fantasy football team will be taking on 3rd place Brian and his 4-2 team.

I've already spoken to the guys this week and let them know that even though we're out of it, we're playing for pride. Playing for one another. Anything can happen in a rivalry game. We're gonna take it to Brian and his boys this week.

Prediction: Eric's team: 80
Brian's team: 72

Desean you got JACKsonED up...

The Only thing that beats that is this:



"That is a serious knee injury for Willis McGahee"..."Yep".

Cliff BEAST-LEE

I know what you're thinking...wow that's a catchy fucking title to this blog. And you're right...I came up with it last night while I was brushing before bed. Anyway Cliff Lee absolutely fucking dominated the world last night...dude threw like 22 innings and gave up 2 hits. Texas broke the game open in the 9th and are up 2-1 in the ALCS.

The point of this blog however isn't to say how great baseball is. It's to point out exactly why baseball sucks. I was flipping back between the baseball game and the football game last night, and when the first Texas batter got up in the top of the 9th there was about 3 minutes left in the 3rd quarter of the football game. When the last yankee batter got out in the bottom of the 9th the football game had about 45 seconds left. The football game played almost 20 minutes of game time in ONE INNING! Almost 1/3 of the football game was played in ONE FUCKING INNING! Are you kidding me? Baseball is the longest most fucking boring shit on TV right now and I'm not just talking sports...baseball is more boring than a fucking lifetime movie.

Apparently Payback AND Karma are both bitches...

So for the 8 of you that read my payback is a motherfucker blog just a few days ago I've recently learned Karma is a bitch too. I sent bad vibes out to John Elway and what happened? He fucked me in my fantasy game last night. My team was 0-5 heading into the MNF matchup between the Titans and Jags. I was down 21 points, but I had Vince Young. VY goes B-A-N-A-N-A-S on the first drive throwing for 60 yards and a TD like 2 minutes into the game. I've got this shit on lock right? WRONG...karma bites me in the ass as VY goes down for the count and misses the rest of the game. Easy E falls to 0-6 in Fantasy football.

Well that effin hurt

So it seems I never learn my lesson. I really do suck at picking college football...the NFL I'm actually not so bad. Here are week 6 results:

In college:

Utah handled their business and covered vs. Wyoming.

Fucking Florida lost outright at home! vs. Mississippi State! are you effin kidding me?

Alabama won, but didn't cover...the state of Mississippi really fucked me like a 2 bit whore this saturday.

Nevada game I think just went final out in Hawaii and they lost outright too.

As far as the NFL goes:

The Ravens heard that I bet them on the money line and decided to hand the Pats a fucking win. I mean seriously how the hell did the Ravens blow that game? No really, I'm asking anyone who might know because CBS had bull riding on instead of that game so I'm not even sure. Thanks Jim Nantz!

The Falcons fell behind early and get mashed in Philly, at least Dunta Robinson laid the effin wood on Desean jackson to make me feel a little better about losing.

Steelers covered vs. those Cleveland bitches easily.

And semi upset pick of the week Saint Louis won outright at home. If you're dumb enough to bet the Chargers on the road you deserve to lose money.

This week: 3-5

NFL: 9-6

CFB: 3-7

Overall: 12-13

ROI: -$420 (In the red for the first time all season)

229'in It.

Sunday came and Sunday went. Jets played and Jets won. Football has been fuckin awesome this year. My team is 5-1, my fantasy team is 5-1, and (no homo) my boys and I just fuckin rock out every week. This past weekend I had the 229 crew at the crib minus Joe who was in DC.

Ladainian Tomlinson is THAT DUDE. You cant say MVP without thinking LT. This is definately a special football season. I can just feel it. If you readers were smart you would make it even more special by betting against Easy E's pics every week. I am expecting a call from a huge Vegas bookie one day telling us we better not post pics on the blog anymore because its affecting the way people bet in vegas. If you idiots are smart you would be up big money already. I bet against whatever Eric says every week. If he says its sunny, bring an umbrella. Trust me.

But yea, 1st place in the NFL feels fuckin awesome. Being a Jets fan for this long has had me getting use to sucking fat dick. We will suck dick no more. We are the creme of the crop boy. Holler.

PS. Anyone see Braylon getting doing his civil duty and watering the grass in the Denver endzone?? Dude pulled out the sprinkler after raping Chump Bailey.
Peep the 25 second mark. It's watering time.

We Fly High, No Lie

BALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIN



Picture explains it all. Hop off

Hofstra WATTTTTTTTTTTTT

So I just got back from lunch and I had this package waiting for me at my door. Turns out the head coach of the Hofstra Baskeball team sent me a Hofstra hoops shirt along with a little note;

Thanks For The T + The Support! CALL ANYTIME

Mo Cassara




I got to be honest. I have no fucking clue what this guy is talking about. I guess he bought a tshirt from us or something? Welcome to the club buddy. Anyway even though I have no idea why he sent me this I’m totally on board with the Flying Dutchman now. They are my team! In fact I promise you this Mo Cassara. If you make the dance this year the Stool will fly out and party at whatever region you play in and root you the fuck on. That’s a fucking promise from one leader of men to another. Oh and don’t think I’m not going to give you a buzz before that UNC game in the Puerto Rico Tip Off. Shit is on ESPN 2. I need some winners.

PS – After doing some quick research turns out Mo used to be an assistant at BC. Once again this proves what I say about the superfans. The athletes and coaches their actually like us because they agree with everything we say about their student body.

Double PS – I told the Sales Guy what happened and his first question was “Do a lot of Jews go there?” Fucking sales guy.

So I just peep my second favorite website, barstoolsports.com. While perusing the Boston part of it, I came across the above article. Hofstra made it son. STAND UP. Hofsta Basketball 2010-2011 ALL FUCKIN DAY.

We got El Pres and the rest of the stoolies on board now. Lets get some.

ALCS Preview

As anyone didnt see this happening. The only surprise here is that I was actually wrong. I didnt know the Twins were actually the Royals just dressed in Twins uniforms for the ALDS. That shit was pathetic right? Well, for the ALCS its no different. The Yankees will win in 5 games. As they fall behind tonight 1-0, they will sweep the rest of the series. Baseball is for the birds. I dont give a shit who wins, but it will be Yanks in 5. All the fake yankee fans who have no idea the pitching rotation will be happy. "Yo.. Bro, whose pitching tonight bro? Umm, CC Sabathia. Heard of him?

Taking It Back

Last Sunday, I went to my fav. place to watch football games on television. North Brunswick Pub and Grill on Route 1. Let me say that I would NEVER watch a Jets game there. I only watch those games live in person, or at a friends house that passes the Jets test. Real fans know what that means. Onto to the point of the blog though.

A few months ago, I wrote a blog about one Jamie J (Jeans pictured above). In that blog, I mentioned that she was a curse to all of my sports teams yadda, yadda, yadda. At that time, we were not really talking all that much, so it was easy for me to blame something on her such as this. Truth is, we dated for a few weeks way back when and all my teams slumped when I was with her. I told her it was her fault, but looking back, it really wasnt. My teams just fucking sucked dick.

Hofstra Basketball had its best years when we were together. So I cant really blame her for that one.

New York Yankees, nough said. I apologize to all men across the country for liking baseball. WTF was with me back then? Baseball is a sport for women. I should be kissing Jamie's feet for gettin me out of baseball. (She didnt really get me out of baseball, but I saw what a herb I was back then)

New York Jets. Wow I love the Jets. They had some years with a few wins here and there but for the most part they never pieced it together. Last year, they hired Rex Ryan as hashem errr I mean coach. Since then, they have made it to the AFC Championship every single year. Is that good? NBD. **I took Jamie to her first Jets game ever. They lost. Victor Hobson returned a fumble to the 1 fuckin yard line and they couldnt score. Thats where some of that hate comes from in regards to my fave. teams**

Recently, Jamie has lifted her hate ban on me and we have talked a few times. At first, I was very hesitant moving foward with this, but she insisted. Now, the Jets are in first fuckin place, and just ballin' all year long.

I write this blog because at The Pub last week, Jamie mentioned the past blog. So I guess i owed her an apology. Here ya go Jamie. Baby steps

Payback is a bitch motherfucker...

Hall of Fame quarterback John Elway and a business partner invested $15 million with a hedge-fund manager who was recently arrested for running a Ponzi scheme.

The Denver Post reported that the two invested $15 million with Sean Mueller in March with the understanding that the money would be placed in a trust until a final decision was made about where it would be invested.

About 65 people had invested $71 million with Mueller over the past decade. Yet in April, Mueller only had $9.5 million, according to a state investigator. He turned himself in to authorities on Wednesday on charges of racketeering, securities fraud and theft, and is being held in prison on $2 million bond.

Elway and his partner have asked that their claim be processed ahead of any other investors' because their $15 million was supposed to be placed in a trust, not pooled with the money of the rest of the hedge fund. According to an April filing, $12 million of Elway's money was placed into a Morgan Stanley trust account, as expected. The other $3 million has gone missing.


Well, well, well...what do we have here? To our readers out there, let this be a lesson...karma always fucking gets you. Even if it's 12 years later and goes by the name of Sean Mueller the hedge-fund manager. You think you could get away with beating our beloved Jets in the AFC Championship game and nothing would happen? Wrong bitch...and now you pay to the tune of 3 million dollars and public embarrassment for being stupid enough to invest with a hedge-fund manager. Were you living under a rock for that whole Bernie Madoff incident? Oh and by the way John, that was our year, congrats on getting lucky with 6 Jets turnovers. I hope you've learned your lesson.

P.S.- Big ups to my boy Sean Mueller for rockin a cool 3 millie from this little Elway bitch. Guaranteed you look in this Mueller guys closet you'll find an old #28 Curtis Martin jersey.

P.P.S.- Wipe that smile off your face you fucking bitch.

Easy E's Picks Week 6

So it was a struggle last week...1-3 just isn't gonna cut it for the six of you that read our blog. This week I'm firing bullets early and often and I'm going to try and get back on track. I'm 0 for my last 4 picking college after a 2-0 start, so logic says that I should slow down there...but in the name of being a true degenerate, not only will I pick college games this week, but I'm picking the most games so far this season...here we go:

Utah -20.5 @ Wyoming: I know you're thinking, why does this kid pick these redic conference games...blah blah blah...bottom line is Utah is a scoring machine, and Wyoming has literally nothing in the entire state except like six chicks with herpes.

The pick: Utah

Florida -$300 money line vs. Mississippi St: Miss St. is actually not that bad, but Florida is coming off of 2 losses in a row and playing at the swamp, there is no way Urban Myer lets his guys blow a 3rd game in a row especially at home.

The pick: Florida

Alabama -20.5 vs. Mississippi: Yes, as you can see I hate the state of Mississippi. I'm picking against both of their teams, but to be honest I don't get upset because most people in that state can't even add to two to be able to figure that out. Bama is gonna roll effin tide.

The pick: A-LA-BAMA (done in Keith Jackson voice)

Nevada -7 @ Hawaii: The O/U in this game is no joke like 420 points or something...and I'm pretty sure when Hawaii is home the games are played on like Tuesday or something...but I'm sticking with my wolfpack...even though they fucked me once before, they should beat the warriors waaaay out west.

The pick: Nevada

Onto the NFL:

Ravens +120 @ Pats: I was considering taking Baltimore plus the points, but then I realized fuck that...I can win extra money by taking them on the money line. Baltimore is one of the 3 best teams in the league, and New England is not...I realize the Pats are coming off a bye and want pay back and all shit like that, but it's put up or cut your pussy ass hair time for Mrs. Brady. This game shows what both teams are made of.

The pick: Ravens

Falcons +125 @ Eagles: This is basically the same game as the Ravens/Pats just in the NFC. You can argue that the Falcons are the best team in the NFC, so it's hard to not like them to win especially with K. Kolb getting the nod in philly this week.

The pick: Falcons +125

Steelers -13.5 vs. Browns: Wow...what can you say. You HATE laying 2 td's in ANY division game. And the Browns defense actually isn't THAT bad. But...Big Ben is back from raping chicks for 4 games, and the Steelers are coming off a bye. Did I mention they are playing IN pittsburgh AND Colt McCoy is getting the start? Hell...I'd lay 3 td's here.

The pick: Steelers

Rams +8.5 vs. Chargers: Well well well...so far this season we've learned a few things...neither of these teams can play on the road. San Diego has to be one of the biggest road money burner teams in recent memory. St. Louis sucks, don't get me wrong, but picking up more than a TD at home vs. a team that hasn't won on the road since the Clinton administration...I'll take my chances.

The pick: Rams

There you have it folks...8 games this week instead of 4...so be prepared to lose twice the amount of your money! Either way just sit back relax and enjoy the games.

Do I Curse Too Much?

So after this weeks Monday night beatdown of the Vikings, the question was raised if I curse too much at Jet games??

Am I a degenerate? I dont think so. I mean, I give to all types of charities and shit. So what I curse at Jets games right? We have this family that sits 2 rows in front of us. They bring their kid to games sometimes. He has to be no older than 2. Can he actually hear me? Hell no. This kid cant even wipe his own ass yet. He still shits himself. Do you think if I call Brett Favre a "fuckin bitch ass" he is going to remember it? I highly doubt it. If he does, then I think I would be the worlds best teacher. Molding young minds 2 rows in front of me at the age of 2.

Onto older subjects. If you go to a football game, and you are offended by cursing then suck my dick. My good friend Beef said I curse too much, but she later said that it didnt offend her, and she didnt care. I agree with Beef. I do curse a lot at games, but I kind of dont care. I pay $120 a game to have the time of my life, and when the Jets win, I do. I had a fuckin blast Monday Night. We had steak, chili, and buffalo chicken at the tailgate. We had a D-Lo pick 6 to ice the game, and we had a L. Coles' Stepfather fantasy win. What is better than that? NOTHING. Also, the time we had Monday night was epic. The tailgating crew was into it as ever, and the rain made it that much cooler. We were soaked, but fuckin warriors through and through. We are like the fuckin USPS, no rain, sleet, or snow is stopping our crew.

-Brian